Dash it, can't think of a neat line to start off, you know the kind which will grab the eyeballs and ensure the reader stays hooked. Heck whatever.
A confession to start with - I am not much of a TV person, it just doesn't interest me enough - unless there's a football match on, then wild horses wouldn't drag me away from my fav spot in front of the idiot box. Turn my nose up on reality shows, soaps, movies with ads interspersed or is it the other way around, the interminable song and dance channels including MTV (those guys used to air some real songs eons ago, remember), oh and news - the sods need to redefine the term 'breaking news' - what passes off as breaking news is awfully passe, but that's another blog.
So last week was a landmark kinda day for me. A lazy Sunday afternoon and decided to catch up on some slasher movies - hey, its not a crime to watch them - agree they are not classics - anything but, but I still enjoy them. Hate the romantic mushy kinda movies - I mean Tom Hanks is good in Sleepless in Seattle (that's to ensure I don't lose the few friends I have), but his classics are still Forest Gump and Saving Private Ryan - you get the picture.
Where was I? Yeah, so yours faithfully dug out the worst slasher movies put together in the last couple of decades and ran through them in no particular order. I was midway through the Texas chainsaw massacre when I heard a scream which couldn't be attributed to any of the lead characters. Oh hell, Mom. And she had that absolutely horrified look which I knew meant trouble (read that with capslock on, fontsize 32 and span colour=red). I try pacifying her - Mom its ok, its just a movie.
She goes - Why can't you watch normal movies like the others do.
Mom those are for sissies (heck apologies guys but I had to save my skin)
Mom continues - Its precisely after watching these kind of movies that girls cut their BFs into 300 pieces and burn them without a touch of remorse.
Hell, hell, hell, this is hitting below the belt. Wait, I can still salvage the day - Mom, I don't have a BF. A mistake and I realized it the moment I blurted it out.
Mom - Exactly my point. You are so busy watching this junk that you don't mingle (wazzat) with people your age.
I try the normal excuses - I was just researching on the violent tendencies prevalent in the US during the 1980s, trying to understand the psyche behind murder, no go, give up
Mom - As parents its our duty to get you to the right track. If we let you go astray, you will end up as another Maria.
Game, set and match my mom.
I spend the rest of the day pacifying her. Cuts no ice, she's shrewd. Damn why didn't I get those genes. She relents on condition that I throw away the DVDs - hah, have loaned them to a friend, and hope to God her kid bro doesn't watch it
And in the meantime, she's taken to locking away the knives at night. Whatever happended to good old trust.
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